I'm moving into my own place tomorrow! And I am really excited! It will be my own, little space to set up how I want. It is a move of independence. But today I can't stop crying.
It doesn't help that I am sick again, and missed work. Being frequently sick does not mesh well with a very physical job. It needs to stop.
But all I can think about today is how heartbroken I am. I know that I left him, but my heart still hurts. I know it has been months... but we dated for years, and I thought it would last... so months don't really matter.
I get so angry thinking about all this! I blame him, then myself. It's just a crappy place to be.
And I can't help wondering why it is all coming up now, when I am supposed to be happy and moving on with my life. I just went through six months of hell and I am picking up the pieces of it and it is finally all coming together. But I can't be happy because everytime something happy happens I just think of him. And I miss him, and I hate him, and love him all at the same time.