Today I came home from school in tears. Tears of frustration, pain, and humiliation. The thing is though, I am the only one who saw it. I am the only one who sees that my professor treats me unfairly. And I have hesitated talking about it with anyone because I don't want to sound like I need to have teachers approval all the time. I am in my fifth year of school. I am not inexperienced with bad teachers. I know that even the good teachers don't have time to dole out compliments everyday. That is not what I am searching for. I just don't want to be singled out. I don't want to be the only one in my class that he looks down upon, or at least treats that way.
But what can I do?
I could talk to him, sure. I probably will if it gets worse. I could bring it up with the administrators. But I can also learn to let go of other peoples opinions of me.
And, although I wasn't happy with my grade on my paper that I got back today, it was fair. He isn't letting his personal opinion of me and my views on the literature we are discussing affect how he grades me. So, I think that I just need to suck it up.
That being said, my day has gotten much better.
I remedied a bad day of classes with melty chocolate chip cookies and a cold glass of milk. Well, more like a cold carton of milk. And I realized that carbs make homework easier! The only hard thing was forcing myself to study for my archaeology test tomorrow instead of finishing Mill on the Floss.
While I was doing homework, my cow sized neighbors were stomping around upstairs. I really can't wait to move!
And it's not that far away. I keep thinking of how we should arrange the furniture. Which room will be Jonathan's workspace, and which one will be my makeshift hobby art studio. What color I am going to paint the kitchen. What vegetables I want to plant...
oh it's so exciting!
I think that I can get some sleep just dreaming about all this even if my neighbors continue with their evil plot to kill me... :)